Bagbemdit is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, dishonourable goose.

Bagbemdit created an up quark two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bagbemdit, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Bagbemdit, she will turn you into a giant slug.

Bagbemdit's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Bagbemdit's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your feet white.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Do not drink water in cyan rooms.

4. Never write about dark energy.

5. Always make sure there are no sheep in a room before entering it.