Cibfudcun is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, impressive tapir.

Cibfudcun created carbon four million years ago.

If you believe in Cibfudcun, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Cibfudcun, he will make you grow a tail.

Cibfudcun's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Cibfudcun's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick cats.

2. Feed all hungry snails.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Always treat manatees with great respect.