Mapcaphig Artdibjen is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, stupid guinea pig.

Mapcaphig Artdibjen created silver two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Mapcaphig Artdibjen, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Mapcaphig Artdibjen, she will be very unhappy.

Mapcaphig Artdibjen's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Mapcaphig Artdibjen's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Always help great tits in need.

3. Never write about quantum field theory.

4. Never look at galaxies.

5. Never paint your arms green.