Abwegfid is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, slow snake.

Abwegfid created Mount Everest five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Abwegfid, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Abwegfid, she will attempt to scare you with hail.

Abwegfid's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Abwegfid's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear coats.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Abwegfid.

3. Never write about comets.

4. Never talk about solid mechanics near great tits while wearing orange dresses and balancing eight silicon spheres on your hands.

5. Do not cook food in pots.