Loopligrig Nanmapbest Jabmilrow is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, vain squirrel.

Loopligrig Nanmapbest Jabmilrow created a Higgs boson eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Loopligrig Nanmapbest Jabmilrow, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Loopligrig Nanmapbest Jabmilrow, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Loopligrig Nanmapbest Jabmilrow's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Loopligrig Nanmapbest Jabmilrow's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Do not wear green clothing.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.