Quamflabbell is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, self-confident ferret.

Quamflabbell created time and space four billion years ago.

If you believe in Quamflabbell, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Quamflabbell, it will turn you into a snail.

Quamflabbell's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Quamflabbell's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed beans to moths while wearing scarves.

2. Pray towards the north.

3. Never paint your chest cyan.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Never write about dwarf planets.