Legbedtonk is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, intelligent wasp.

Legbedtonk created the world twelve years ago.

If you believe in Legbedtonk, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Legbedtonk, it will turn you into a slug.

Legbedtonk's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Legbedtonk's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about moons.

2. Never write about photosynthesis.

3. Never think about quantum mechanics near hamsters while wearing mauve ear rings and balancing seven lead spheres on your legs.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Never think about black holes.