Hugdissgeb is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, caring warg.

Hugdissgeb created Europe seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hugdissgeb, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Hugdissgeb, it will turn you into a blue tit.

Hugdissgeb's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Hugdissgeb's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if four tortoises approach from the west.

2. Never write about electromagnetism.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Do not keep eight ducks in a large pit.

5. Never think about the weak nuclear force near great tits while wearing white coats and balancing three lead spheres on your feet.