Canarnaf is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, all-powerful faun.

Canarnaf created an up quark two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Canarnaf, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Canarnaf, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Canarnaf's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Canarnaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about tapirs.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Always help capybaras.

5. Do not kill foxes.