Basswatmap is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, calm rat.

Basswatmap created Africa four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Basswatmap, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Basswatmap, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Basswatmap's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Basswatmap's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed corn to ants while wearing ear rings.

2. Do not kill capybaras.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never think about solid mechanics near sharks while wearing magenta stockings and balancing five gold spheres on your face.