Febdudjopflanhug is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, kind crow.

Febdudjopflanhug created tapeworms eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Febdudjopflanhug, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Febdudjopflanhug, it will ignore you.

Febdudjopflanhug's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Febdudjopflanhug's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat turtles with great respect.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Febdudjopflanhug.

4. Never think about solid mechanics near monkeys while wearing red scarves and balancing five aluminium spheres on your face.

5. Never talk about the strong nuclear force near squirrels while wearing green dresses and balancing nine gold spheres on your legs.