Gadfedgil is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, overgenerous porpoise.

Gadfedgil created a quark four million years ago.

If you believe in Gadfedgil, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Gadfedgil, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Gadfedgil's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Gadfedgil's Holy Commandments

1. Never sing near sheep.

2. Learn seven new languages a year.

3. You must love Gadfedgil.

4. Hide if six eagles approach from the south.

5. Never think about quantum gravity near whales while wearing fawn skirts and balancing eight lead spheres on your neck.