Stragyartcungov Ditingwab is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, slow cat.

Stragyartcungov Ditingwab created silver seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Stragyartcungov Ditingwab, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Stragyartcungov Ditingwab, it will turn you into a worm.

Stragyartcungov Ditingwab's most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.

Stragyartcungov Ditingwab's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry pigs.

2. Monkeys are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Never think ill of sick ducks.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.