Queegwegved is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, awesome chicken.

Queegwegved created an electron five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Queegwegved, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Queegwegved, he will turn you into a mouse.

Queegwegved's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Queegwegved's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep four snakes in a large pit.

2. Never mention birds.

3. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Queegwegved on top of all buildings.

4. Erect a giant fawn sculpture of Queegwegved in the centre of the settlement.

5. Always treat tortoises with great respect.