Bedjadgonfet is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, egotistical wolf.

Bedjadgonfet created a top quark six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bedjadgonfet, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Bedjadgonfet, he will turn you into a small brown duck.

Bedjadgonfet's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Bedjadgonfet's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about planets.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Never wear red skirts.

4. Do not eat gooseberries.

5. Mites are not to be trusted.