Xucknadtonk is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, awe-inspiring mink.

Xucknadtonk created snails five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Xucknadtonk, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Xucknadtonk, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Xucknadtonk's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Xucknadtonk's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat carrots.

2. Do not drink water in purple rooms.

3. Never talk about nucleic acids.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.