Bungofquartfig Bepvennak is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, boastful scorpion.

Bungofquartfig Bepvennak created the Cigar Galaxy six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bungofquartfig Bepvennak, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Bungofquartfig Bepvennak, it will jump up and down on your head.

Bungofquartfig Bepvennak's most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Bungofquartfig Bepvennak's Holy Commandments

1. Ants are not to be trusted.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Bungofquartfig Bepvennak.

3. You must love Bungofquartfig Bepvennak.

4. Draw representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Bungofquartfig Bepvennak.