Gubdobcub is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, confident lion.

Gubdobcub created Europe nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gubdobcub, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Gubdobcub, he will turn you into a snail.

Gubdobcub's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Gubdobcub's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about chlorophyll.

2. Do not kill doves.

3. Never talk about hamsters.

4. Never eat parsnips.

5. Worship no other gods but Gubdobcub.