Quamdavhub is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, egotistical parrot.

Quamdavhub created the Milkyway seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Quamdavhub, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Quamdavhub, he will be very sad.

Quamdavhub's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Quamdavhub's Holy Commandments

1. Erect eight silver sculptures of Quamdavhub on top of important buildings.

2. Never talk about special relativity near porpoises while wearing indigo shoes and balancing nine silicon spheres on your face.

3. Feed all hungry seals.

4. Never feed beans to mice while wearing purple jumpers.

5. Do not make images of living things.