Bunnurtven is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, stupid dragonfly.

Bunnurtven created the universe five billion years ago.

If you believe in Bunnurtven, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Bunnurtven, it will turn you into a mole.

Bunnurtven's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Bunnurtven's Holy Commandments

1. Bunnurtven loves gulls, so they must be honoured.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Always make sure there are no monkeys in a room before entering it.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Never think about archaea.