Danpitquag is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, egotistical hamster.

Danpitquag created the universe three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Danpitquag, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Danpitquag, it will destroy your favourite planet.

Danpitquag's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Danpitquag's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Always help dogs in need.

4. Do not hurt sharks.

5. You must never eat limes.