Venstaffad is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, all-knowing wombat.

Venstaffad created the planet Saturn nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Venstaffad, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Venstaffad, it will turn you into a rat.

Venstaffad's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Venstaffad's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Never hurt moths.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.