Gepquatcedhug is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, emotional bat.

Gepquatcedhug created the cosmos four billion years ago.

If you believe in Gepquatcedhug, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Gepquatcedhug, it will try to impress you with trees.

Gepquatcedhug's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Gepquatcedhug's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in yellow rooms.

2. Always help otters in need.

3. Always wear purple.

4. Never talk about horizontal gene transfer.

5. Always stare at clouds.