Jigtofhit is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, boastful scorpion.

Jigtofhit created the planet Saturn three million years ago.

If you believe in Jigtofhit, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Jigtofhit, he will ignore you and hope you go away.

Jigtofhit's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Jigtofhit's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if three goats approach from the west.

2. Do not skip in public.

3. You must pray to Jigtofhit six times a day.

4. Always look after injured otters.

5. Never play with disobedient children.