Jentinzed is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, smart yak.

Jentinzed created a photon six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jentinzed, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Jentinzed, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Jentinzed's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Jentinzed's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the west.

2. Jentinzed loves aardvarks, so they must be respected.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Never hurt geese.