Baffasmif is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, contented grasshopper.

Baffasmif created the cosmos seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Baffasmif, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Baffasmif, it will destroy your favourite star.

Baffasmif's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Baffasmif's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry geese.

2. Paint representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place in blue.

3. You must pray to Baffasmif three times a day.

4. Never think about dark matter near mice while wearing black dresses and balancing nine copper spheres on your back.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.