Gepzimpark is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, unthinking hydra.

Gepzimpark created the Sombrero Galaxy two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gepzimpark, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Gepzimpark, she will turn you into a rat.

Gepzimpark's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Gepzimpark's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Gepzimpark.

2. Always make sure there are no snails in a building before entering it.

3. Do not hurt voles.

4. Always treat eagles with great respect.

5. Never wear orange dresses.