Hanarfdud is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, annoying goblin.

Hanarfdud created Africa three million years ago.

If you believe in Hanarfdud, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Hanarfdud, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Hanarfdud's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Hanarfdud's Holy Commandments

1. Hanarfdud loves cats, so they must be honoured.

2. Never think about quantum field theory near tapirs while wearing turquoise tights and balancing five silicon spheres on your neck.

3. Always look after injured grasshopers.

4. Do not drink water in gray rooms.

5. Never think ill of sick eagles.