Basscibflap is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, narcissistic goat.

Basscibflap created Mount Everest five billion years ago.

If you believe in Basscibflap, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Basscibflap, she will send four elephants to rub you out.

Basscibflap's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Basscibflap's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about dark energy.

2. You must love Basscibflap.

3. You must never eat turnips.

4. Worship no other gods but Basscibflap.

5. Do not drink alcohol.