Bumdusscum Dussdobjig is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, unthoughtful mongoose.

Bumdusscum Dussdobjig created the Cigar Galaxy eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bumdusscum Dussdobjig, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Bumdusscum Dussdobjig, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Bumdusscum Dussdobjig's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Bumdusscum Dussdobjig's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt frogs.

2. Never sit near cats.

3. Do not wear nickel on your body.

4. Do not run in public.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate horses.