Shavlakbim is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, deceitful finch.

Shavlakbim created a charm quark seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Shavlakbim, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Shavlakbim, it will turn you into an amoeba.

Shavlakbim's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Shavlakbim's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the north.

2. Never talk about moons.

3. Never think about ultrasonics.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Do not stand on grass.