Farfetsaf is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, wise scorpion.

Farfetsaf created Africa two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Farfetsaf, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Farfetsaf, she will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Farfetsaf's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Farfetsaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill tortoises.

2. You must never eat garlic.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Farfetsaf must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Do not trade with those who eat bread.