Tonfidquart is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, idiotic rhinoceros.

Tonfidquart created the planet Venus four billion years ago.

If you believe in Tonfidquart, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Tonfidquart, she will ignore you.

Tonfidquart's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Tonfidquart's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear iron on your body.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.