Pitwonfen is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, prudent deer.

Pitwonfen created light six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pitwonfen, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Pitwonfen, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Pitwonfen's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Pitwonfen's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate birds.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Pray towards the north.

4. Never think about nebulae.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate manatees.