Flagbenzig Dissjarnwee is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, resourceful duck.

Flagbenzig Dissjarnwee created the world two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flagbenzig Dissjarnwee, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Flagbenzig Dissjarnwee, he will destroy your favourite solar system.

Flagbenzig Dissjarnwee's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Flagbenzig Dissjarnwee's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant fawn sculpture of Flagbenzig Dissjarnwee in the centre of the settlement.

2. Do not wear black clothing.

3. Always help sick geese.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Hide if six dogs approach from the west.