Bem is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, almighty squid.

Bem created a charm quark seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bem, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Bem, it will make you grow a tail.

Bem's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Bem's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Bem.

2. Do not leap in public.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. You must pray to Bem six times a day.

5. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place in blue.