Toftancut is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, blissful crane.

Toftancut created a down quark five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Toftancut, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Toftancut, she will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Toftancut's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Toftancut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt grasshopers.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Erect a giant lead sculpture of Toftancut in the centre of the settlement.

4. Never wear indigo rings.

5. Never talk about spacetime.