Basscedwee is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, stupid cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Basscedwee created oxygen seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Basscedwee, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Basscedwee, he will turn you into a worm.

Basscedwee's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Basscedwee's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Do not trade with those who eat spinach.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Never hurt horses.

5. Never think about deoxyribonucleic acid.