Dissartkop is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, resourceful goat.

Dissartkop created a bottom quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dissartkop, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Dissartkop, she will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Dissartkop's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Dissartkop's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat tomatoes.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Never think about special relativity near ants while wearing violet scarves and balancing five copper spheres on your back.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.