Hugfenpan is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, kind hedgehog.

Hugfenpan created energy four billion years ago.

If you believe in Hugfenpan, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Hugfenpan, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Hugfenpan's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Hugfenpan's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of rice to otters while wearing black skirts.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Always pray immersed in water.