Fomfutyak is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, sage faun.

Fomfutyak created the world nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Fomfutyak, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Fomfutyak, he will curse you with boils.

Fomfutyak's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Fomfutyak's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Fomfutyak.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Fomfutyak must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Never hurt nematodes.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of lead.