Titpakven is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, intelligent mongoose.

Titpakven created parasitic wasps two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Titpakven, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Titpakven, she will turn you into a frog.

Titpakven's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Titpakven's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Titpakven's priests.

2. Draw representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Always help doves.

4. Do not eat lemons.

5. Erect a giant gold sculpture of Titpakven in the centre of the settlement.