Popzodarfzimjandundunnut is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, merciless gorilla.

Popzodarfzimjandundunnut created humanity nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Popzodarfzimjandundunnut, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Popzodarfzimjandundunnut, she will make you grow a tail.

Popzodarfzimjandundunnut's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Popzodarfzimjandundunnut's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed apples to turtles while wearing ear rings.

2. Do not drink water in pink rooms.

3. Never think about fluid mechanics.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate cats.

5. Run away if nine foxes approach from the south.