Nur Nellhudcat is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, ill-tempered human.

Nur Nellhudcat created viruses eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nur Nellhudcat, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Nur Nellhudcat, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Nur Nellhudcat's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Nur Nellhudcat's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Do not dye your hair black.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. You must never eat rice.

5. Never feed melons to ducks while wearing pink kilts.