Dumfebjad is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, loving swan.

Dumfebjad created silver seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Dumfebjad, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Dumfebjad, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Dumfebjad's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Dumfebjad's Holy Commandments

1. Never sing near ants.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Always help dogs.

4. Never eat melons.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.