Flamvinbustag is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, witless fox.

Flamvinbustag created an electron four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flamvinbustag, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Flamvinbustag, it will send minions to preach to you.

Flamvinbustag's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Flamvinbustag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Never hurt aardvarks.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Run away if three dolphins approach from the west.

5. Never feed wheat to monkeys while wearing rings.