Janlipbun is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, witty ferret.

Janlipbun created oxygen six million years ago.

If you believe in Janlipbun, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Janlipbun, he will turn you into a plant.

Janlipbun's most sacred site is Uruachi in Mexico.

Janlipbun's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant cyan sculpture of Janlipbun in the centre of the settlement.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate pigs.

3. Do not wear iron on your body.

4. Never think about cell theory.

5. Do not shave your face.
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