Yatbimlad is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, conceited donkey.

Yatbimlad created a photon five billion years ago.

If you believe in Yatbimlad, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Yatbimlad, it will be mildly annoyed.

Yatbimlad's most sacred site is Inshas in Egypt.

Yatbimlad's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

2. You must pray to Yatbimlad three times a day.

3. Run away if four bats approach from the north.

4. Never go into indigo rooms.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.