Lidfligflig is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, egotistical seal.

Lidfligflig created Mount Everest seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Lidfligflig, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Lidfligflig, it will be very unhappy.

Lidfligflig's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Lidfligflig's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

2. Erect nine silicon sculptures of Lidfligflig on top of important buildings.

3. Never sit in the presence of geese.

4. Always wear turquoise.

5. Never think about optics near doves while wearing violet stockings and balancing three iron spheres on your chest.