Fatwitcut is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, smart wasp.

Fatwitcut created the planet Mars five billion years ago.

If you believe in Fatwitcut, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Fatwitcut, it will turn you into a worm.

Fatwitcut's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Fatwitcut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Never write about bacteria.

3. Never talk about electromagnetism near ducks while wearing magenta tights and balancing seven gold spheres on your back.

4. Always wear fawn.

5. Pray towards the east.